Instead of listening to them talk about llamas, pay attention to their body language. How are they sitting? What gestures do they make when talking? Notice how relaxed the guests are? As Robert Downey Jr begins to speak, he opens up his body to include everyone.
Graham interacts with the screen behind him but turns when speaking to the guests so they can see his face. Everyone is given their chance to speak and no one person ever dominates the conversation. Did you notice how little he blinks as he talks? Go back and have another look. So the title is a bit of a giveaway. She fidgets as she answers questions and keeps taking deep breaths to try and calm her nerves. The crowd can feel her nerves and that has even more of an effect on her.
This shows just how powerful body language can be. It can shape opinions about us no matter what we say. If you stare at someone and subconsciously grind your teeth then others are going to notice and be defensive. Try to be aware of the impact that your body language is having during different interactions throughout the day. Nonverbal communication is a rapidly flowing back-and-forth process that requires your full focus on the moment-to-moment experience.
As well as being fully present, you can improve how you communicate nonverbally by learning to manage stress and developing your emotional awareness. Stress compromises your ability to communicate. And remember: emotions are contagious. If you are upset, it is very likely to make others upset, thus making a bad situation worse. Take a moment to calm down before you jump back into the conversation. The fastest and surest way to calm yourself and manage stress in the moment is to employ your senses—what you see, hear, smell, taste, and touch—or through a soothing movement.
By viewing a photo of your child or pet, smelling a favorite scent, listening to a certain piece of music, or squeezing a stress ball, for example, you can quickly relax and refocus. Since everyone responds differently, you may need to experiment to find the sensory experience that works best for you.
In order to send accurate nonverbal cues, you need to be aware of your emotions and how they influence you. You also need to be able to recognize the emotions of others and the true feelings behind the cues they are sending.
This is where emotional awareness comes in. Pay attention to inconsistencies. Nonverbal communication should reinforce what is being said. Is the person saying one thing, but their body language conveying something else? Look at nonverbal communication signals as a group.
Consider all of the nonverbal signals you are receiving, from eye contact to tone of voice and body language. Taken together, are their nonverbal cues consistent—or inconsistent—with what their words are saying? Trust your instincts. Eye contact — Is the person making eye contact?
If so, is it overly intense or just right? Facial expression — What is their face showing? Is it masklike and unexpressive, or emotionally present and filled with interest?
Posture and gesture — Is their body relaxed or stiff and immobile? Are their shoulders tense and raised, or relaxed? Touch — Is there any physical contact?
Is it appropriate to the situation? Does it make you feel uncomfortable? Intensity — Does the person seem flat, cool, and disinterested, or over-the-top and melodramatic? Timing and place — Is there an easy flow of information back and forth?
Do nonverbal responses come too quickly or too slowly? Sounds — Do you hear sounds that indicate interest, caring or concern from the person? Authors: Jeanne Segal, Ph. Subscribe to our FREE newsletter and start improving your life in just 5 minutes a day. Our page on Non-Verbal Communication explains that non-verbal communication is a vital part of understanding and communication.
The rest of the information is conveyed non-verbally, by tone of voice, facial expressions, eye-contact, gestures, how we stand, and so on. There are many different types of non-verbal communication. This page is one of two on this issue, and explains the non-verbal communication associated with the body, including body language or body movements, also known as kinesics, posture, and proxemics, or the message given by how close we stand to someone else.
Body movements include gestures, posture, head and hand movements or whole body movements. Body movements can be used to reinforce or emphasise what a person is saying and also offer information about the emotions and attitudes of a person. However, it is also possible for body movements to conflict with what is said. A skilled observer may be able to detect such discrepancies in behaviour and use them as a clue to what someone is really feeling and thinking. For example, the signals that mean 'OK', 'Come here!
However, be aware that whilst some emblems are internationally recognised, others may need to be interpreted in their cultural context. Gestures which accompany words to illustrate a verbal message are known as illustrators.
For example, the common circular hand movement which accompanies the phrase 'over and over again', or nodding the head in a particular direction when saying 'over there'.
Examples of 'regulators' include head nods, short sounds such as 'uh-huh', 'mm-mm', and expressions of interest or boredom. Regulators allow the other person to adapt his or her speech to reflect the level of interest or agreement. Without receiving feedback, many people find it difficult to maintain a conversation.
Again, however, they may vary in different cultural contexts. Adaptors include such actions as scratching or adjusting uncomfortable glasses, or represent a psychological need such as biting fingernails when nervous.
Although normally subconscious, adaptors are more likely to be restrained in public places than in the private world of individuals where they are less likely to be noticed.
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